Manual Not Included

Luxury, with a twistPosted by Kara on February 8th, 2010

We have a new addition to the family. Her name is Jillian.

Though, I’m not totally sold on the name because I keep picturing Jillian Michaels from Biggest Loser, and Jillian doesn’t exactly scream luxury. I’m pretty sure she just screams. But if I were in charge of names, our new girl would still be a Jane Doe and have to be identified by her grill. I’ve yet to name the new addition we got in August whose newness is rapidly wearing off. 

Jim traded in the beast (as I not-so-lovingly called her; Jim called her Justine), and we got a new-to-us Lincoln Aviator. Now, I know people get new cars all the time, but the prospect of getting a luxury vehicle sparked some deep conversations between Jim and myself. Jim has always been a Jeep man, identifying each Jeep he sees on the road and telling me the make, model, year, etc. He loves himself a Jeep! Something about the rugged durability speaks to him. And then I gave him a beefed up exhaust for Valentine’s Day two years ago, and I thought he was going drive from the muffler shop to the J/P to marry Justine. He called, and they told him he wouldn’t be allowed to marry her because polygamy is against the law in the state of Texas.

Upon visiting Jillian at the dealership, I asked Jim if he could see himself in a Lincoln. I mean, refined people drive Lincolns. Not us. Jim said that he’s planning on making a personality shift to become more refined as his single, engine-revving bachelor days are over. He’s a family man now and needs to be driving a family man vehicle (though, he’s told me that if I ever suggest a minivan he’s out!)

Valentine’s Day is coming up, so I sat Jim down on the couch, grabbed his hands, and told him I want to buy Jillian an exhaust to celebrate the day. I could tell he wanted to scream, “YES!” but something was holding him back.

Kara: “I want you to have an exhaust for Jillian.”
Jim: “Oh, baby, I don’t know. You don’t think it will detract from the luxuriousness of her?”
Kara: “Nah. It’ll make her more Jim-like. It’ll be luxury with a twist!”

If you see a forest green Lincoln driving down the road and think to yourself, “Wow, those people must be refined”, wait for it. Wait for the moment Jim revves his engine causing his Magnaflow exhaust to reverberate just to cause the pigeons pecking at the ground to scatter. And you’ll know amidst the fluttering of countless pigeon wings, that’s a Lincoln with a twist!